I agree

GG2, it does feel good, doesn't it? To get back into those first phases of a new infatuation...

I don't know if there's an emotion that's more difficult to deal with than the fallout that inevitably occurs after a broken heart. Everything reminds you of what went right...what went wrong. You begin to wonder what you could have changed. How much was really your fault. A certain song comes on the radio and you switch the station before you start to cry in the middle of early evening traffic. You laugh and try your best to convince people that any discomfort you feel at this point is merely frustration and a patronizing amusement. You tell everyone around you that you're okay. You hold your tongue and pray that whatever it is that you feel...you pray that it will go away soon. You don't just remember how much he hurt you...you remember everything that made you so happy in the moment and you throw your hands up and wonder what the fuck you did to make him throw that all away.

"How did he forget me so quickly? Why is he doing just fine and I'm still such a mess? And for gods sake, for the mother of everything that is good and holy, what can I do to make this stop? When will I be whole again?"

I don't know exactly what that emotion is. But it hurts. It hurts a whole fucking lot.

And then...there comes a point when those songs don't remind you of him anymore. You keep listening because for the first time, you think about somebody else, and for the first time in months, you can listen with a smile on your face. And it's absolutely wonderful.

I've said this before, but now, I think it's the first time I can really mean it.

I'm free.

To the person who is helping me back onto my feet without really realizing it....thank you. Whatever happens, whatever comes of this, you've already done and given me everything I need.

On a bitchier note, the Honor Roll came in today. The lists for Honors and High Honors are out. Guess who's not on either one...?

HAHA.